For your dedication and possible delight...

OK, creative urge is reaching overload; I have to get it out of my system.

[The Scene - a London flat. Marie is pacing up and down. Suddenly the doorbell rings. With a quick glance at her hair in the mirror, she opens the door. On the step stands David Tennant.]

David: Um...hi. You called me?

[Marie, conjuring up all her will and being, manages not to faint. Instead she smiles at David and stands aside.]

Marie: Ah yes. Please come in.

[He comes in and she shuts the door, mumbling incoherently, "Bowl of sugar..." She leads him to the kitchen and indicates a chair. He sits in it.]

David: [Nervously.] Look, what's going on? I don't know you. Why did you ask me to come round? You said it was a dire emergency...

Marie: [Sitting down facing him.] Hmm? Oh yes, I did, didn't I? Right. Well Doc - I mean David, I've been thinking a lot about this, and I've reached a conclusion, and it's only fair to let you know after all. [Beat.] I think we should get married.

David: *What*???

Marie: Now wait a moment before freaking out, just think about this; I think we're perfect for each other. I mean, I'm an up-and-coming writer, so when I get started I could write your Who scripts for you! We'd be a team! And I'm exactly the right age for you, and...and...you're gorgeous, and you could fight off the cybermen for me...or not. Well, you could put up the shelves, at least.

David: [Freaked out.] Look, um...Marie, I'm very flattered, but I'm afraid I've already got a girlfriend.

Marie: [Darkly.] Ah...Sophia.

David: Yeaahh...

Marie: Hmm.

[She leans across and opens another door, and with one hand pulls a confused Lisa out.

Lisa: Marie, what...? [She sees David.] BLOODY HELL!

Marie: This is Lisa. You could marry Lisa instead!

David: Umm...

Lisa: And what about that minor inconvenience of Cloud, Marie?

Marie: [Sotto voce.] Easily disposed of.

Lisa: Excuse me??

Marie: I said nothing...

[A door bangs somewhere. They both look up and see that David is gone. Marie sighs.]

Marie: Damn, so close...

[Suddenly with a thud and a gasp, Rosby tumbles out of the cupboard underneath the sink.]

Rosby: Gagh! Bloody hell; you need to clean under there, Marie! So, is it an all-go?

Lisa: I'm afraid not. We did try.

Rosby: [Disappointed.] Aww...

Marie: I suppose I should be grateful, really. I mean, we cannot always have what we want, even if we do try...a bit too hard. Sometimes it's better to have a goal rather than an instant solution. And plus, Sophia is a lucky, lucky girl. She deserves him. I'll just carry on watching Doctor Who and doing the standard drooling...

[Long pause. Then...]

Rosby: Have you tried Jake Gyllenhaal?



I have not truly meant to offend anyone. If you are offended, please tell me and I won't send you lot up so much next time.

I've also got to write about something else other than DT as well...