GAGH. When it will be over? When?

Normally, I would be a lot more passionate and capitalised than that on the subject of GCSEs, but that reflects my exact mood at the moment; I am completely exhausted. I really wish it was all over now.

I came up with quite a good analogy of how the GCSEs are making me feel at the moment, earlier, actually. Well, I think it was good. It was greeted with general scepticism from most of my friends, but I'm still sticking to it.

Right, here it is.

Women are pregnant for nine to nine and a half months, if all goes well. Everyone knows that. I often think that if a foetus or a developing baby could think, it would really start to get fed up around the eight-month mark; the build-up and the developing has been so long and drawn-out, and they're stuck in there for what feels like eternity. At around this time they're just waiting, and desperate for it to be over, so they can escape out into the world.

And I think GCSEs are a tiny bit like that. We're the developing babies inside the exam-womb. We've been plodding along with all these subjects since September 2005, and we've done no end of tests, and exams, and coursework, and ever since about January it's been talk of GCSEs non-stop, every single lesson, over and over again. I think Year 11 has got to the stage where the only emotion we have left is total fed-upness and exhaustion, and we're so incredibly close to the finish line, and we just want it to bloody end.

Running for the hills yet? You will be when you've read this bit.

So, anyway; I got quite taken with the womb-baby-exam idea. And that started me off on a few important dates. And quite a few euphemisms:

Conception: September 2005 (Our first term in Year 10 and the introductions to all the courses.)
Waters breaking: 17th May 2007 (When we go off for study leave. Only another week or so to go!)
First contractions: 22nd May 2007 (My first exam; English Lit. This varies from person to person; some people have already started their contractions, i.e. had an official GCSE, although they are ones like language orals or music terminal tasks, which are different to the standard written tests we do in the Gym.
The eventual birth: 18th June 2007 (My last exam; drama. For most people this date is 15th June, but the students doing drama have one final exam the following Monday. Which is annoying, but drama isn't too difficult, so I'll end on a high note. Hopefully.)

As for collecting the exam results on 23rd August...cutting the placenta? I don't know. We'd be getting into quite gruesome territory.

I'm kind of stupidly proud of all that. Gives an edge of humour to the whole situation. And it makes a nice change; I can confuse people by saying, "The waters are breaking soon!" instead of "Thank God it's study leave soon."

Of course, this is probably a confusing mind-warp from a very tired sixteen year old who is sick beyond words of doing science, and is listening to The Fray at very high volume.

Anyway, I'd better go. I'd really appreciate comments; all my other sources have been exhausted when it comes to moaning about the GCSEs.

Rosby out. I should probably make posting a bit more regular after the exams. And commenting on Doctor Who episodes. Evolution of the Daleks was terrible, by the way. It would take too long to go through it in detail now.

P.S. It's been put back a week because of bloody EUROVISION??? *resists urge to kill someone*